


Danganronpa gc fic but its unoriginal

by poeticdumbass



Category: Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: F/F, JKDSHKJDSH, M/M, Multi, chihiro uses they/them pronouns btw, everyones lgbt because fuck you thats why, i dont have any potential ships for them in this fic so ig they're stuck with me, i will add more ships once i get into da other games, im sorry :((( im busy a lot :///, junko flirts with all da girls get this bitch a wife, junko is still ykno.. junko but less murdery, kork is also nb cause once again im kinnie, mukuro is nb because im a nasty kinnie, oh nooo how terrible >:))), random updates!!, shes still a bitch to everyone but shes really nice to mukuro in private, the only het is hifumi, there is gunna be some sexual jokes here nd there cuz theyre teens what do u expect
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-14
Updated: 2020-08-03
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:07:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24174088
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/poeticdumbass/pseuds/poeticdumbass
Summary: discontinued asf sorry besties I hate dr with everything in my body <3
Relationships: Akamatsu Kaede/Iruma Miu, Amami Rantaro/K1-B0, Asahina Aoi/Ogami Sakura, Chabashira Tenko/Yonaga Angie/Yumeno Himiko, Enoshima Junko/Shirogane Tsumugi, Fukawa Touko/Naegi Komaru, Gokuhara Gonta/Hoshi Ryoma, Harukawa Maki/Tojo Kirumi, Hinata Hajime/Komaeda Nagito, Ikusaba Mukuro/Maizono Sayaka, Ishimaru Kiyotaka/Oowada Mondo, Kirigiri Kyoko/Celestia Ludenberg, Momota Kaito/Saihara Shuichi, Naegi Makoto/Togami Byakuya, Nanami Chiaki/Sonia Nevermind/Tsumiki Mikan, Soda Kazuichi/Tanaka Gundham, hagakure yasuhiro/weed
Comments: 60
Kudos: 248





	1. chaos ensues

_**Junko Enoshima added 16 people to Homos of Sexuals** _

_**May 14 2XXX, 1:21pm  
  
**_ **Byakuya Togami:** Junko, what is this?

 **Junko Enoshima:** bro wat da fuk watz wit da way u type??

 **Byakuya Togami:** Unlike your horrible style of typing, I actually have class.

_ **Leon Kuwata is online!** _

**Leon Kuwata:** jeez who pissed in youre cereal this morning richie rich?

 **Byakuya Togami:** Your*

 **Byakuya Togami:** No one did. And frankly that's quite disgusting.

**Leon Kuwata:**

**Leon Kuwata:** bruh  
  
 **Junko Enoshima:** bruh

_ **Makoto Naegi and 3 others are online!** _

**Makoto Naegi:** hey guys! cool groupchat!

 **Mukuro Ikusaba:** Hm.

 **Toko Fukawa:** What is this??

 **Komaru Naegi:** oh hey toki and makoto! and uh hey to the people i dont know?

 **Toko Fukawa:** hey Omaru

 **Makoto Naegi:** omaru??? dont call my sister a potty toko!

 **Toko Fukawa:** lol k

 **Komaru Naegi:** tokiiii play nice

 **Toko Fukawa:** ugh fine

 **Leon Kuwata:** _:eyes: :eyes:_

 **Junko Enoshima:** whipped :3

 **Mukuro Ikusaba:** Junko, why did you make a groupchat?

 **Junko Enoshima:** uh evry1 can talk to eachother duh?? god mukuro u rly r just a dumbazz

 **Mukuro Ikusaba:** Oh... I'm sorry.

_ **10 people are online!** _

**Kyoko Kirigiri:**

**Celestia Ludenberg:**

**Sayaka Maizono:**

**Kiyotaka Ishimaru:**

**Mondo Oowada:**

**Yasuhiro Hagakure:**

**Aoi Asahina:  
**

**Sakura Ogami:**

**Chihiro Fujisaki:**

**Hifumi Yamada:**

**Kyoko Kirigiri:** This chat might be quite useful in the future, good work Junko.

 **Celestia Ludenberg:** Hm, for once I agree with Kyoko.

 **Junko Enoshima:** see??? at least ppl appreciate my hard work!!

 **Kyoko Kirigiri:** Well for once Celestia, you made a smart move.

 **Celestia Ludenberg:** How dare you, you good for nothing detective!

 **Sayaka Maizono:** Is it just me or does Kyoko and Celeste have some um... tension

 **Hifumi Yamada:** Sexual tension ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) 

**Sayaka Maizono:** ew

 **Junko Enoshima:** ew

 **Toko Fukawa:** ew

 **Komaru Naegi:** i don't kno u but ew

 **Byakuya Togami:** Disgusting.

 **Makoto Naegi:** uh-

 **Leon Kuwata:** is he wrong doe? celes nd kyoko do be flirting doe

 **Celestia Ludenberg:** I have standards Kuwata, you are a fool for thinking I would ever want to be associated with someone like Kyoko

 **Kyoko Kirigiri:** Celestia is a criminal and I am a detective. I, too do not want to be associated with the likes of her.

 **Leon Kuwata:** _tension_

 **Sakura Ogami:** Kuwata and Yamada, please refrain from making those kind of comments about our classmates.

 **Aoi Asahina:** yeah!! listen to sakura! 

**Sakura Ogami:** thank you Aoi.

 **Junko Enoshima:** gay

 **Kiyotaka Ishimaru:** Junko! Please do not insult people with 'gay'! We do not want to assume anyone's sexualities here and being gay is okay!

 **Junko Enoshima:** ok twink

 **Kiyotaka Ishimaru:** What is a... Twink?

 **Mondo Oowada:** dont think about too hard bro

 **Kiyotaka Ishimaru:** Bro! Glad to see you joining in!

 **Junko Enoshima:** gay

 **Kiyotaka Ishimaru:** Junko!

 **Yasuhiro Hagakure:** gay

 **Kiyotaka Ishimaru:** Yasuhiro!!

 **Chihiro Fujisaki:** ga- I mean heyy don't bully Taka

 **Junko Enoshima:** ok an knee wheyz evry1 iz online sooo ykno wat dat meanz hehe >:3

 **Makoto Naegi:** oh god 

_ **Junko Enoshima has changed their name to D3ZP41R!!!** _

_ **D3ZP41R!!! has changed 16 names!** _

**Gay Egg 1:** I-

 **Gay Egg 2:** um-

 **Gay Egg 1:** Why is your user that Komaru?

_ **Gay Egg 2 has gone offline!** _

**Gay Egg 1:**???

 **Rich Bitch Mcgee:** How rude.

 **Yumeko Kinnie:** I suppose this is alright..

 **Offbrand Miku:** _you_ ** _b i t c h_**

 **Murkrow:** If this is what Junko wants, then I'm okay with it.

 **Likes riding:** I hate you

 **Scissoring:** how uncreative

 **Kirigiri Jing Jing:** What

 **Weed man:** really?

 **Ballz:** oh come on

 **Precious bby:** aw thx junko

 **Rules Kink:** This is distasteful!

 **Strong Lesbian:** I agree with this

 **Donuts & Pussy: **oh gosh-

 **Simp:** how dare you ms enoshima! i would never be as uncultured like a simp!!

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** shut up incel

** _D3ZP41R!!! has muted Simp for 5 hours  
Reason: nasty_ **

**Gay Egg 2:** wow, ruthless

 **D3ZP41R:** ykno it bby ;)

~~**Scissoring:** fuck off junko, dont flirt with my girlfriend~~

_ **Scissoring has deleted 1 message** _

**Gay Egg 1: _W H A T ????_**

**D3ZP41R:** anna oup

 **Donuts & Pussy: **awww thats so cute

 **Rich Bitch Mcgee:** Huh, at least that pig won't be anywhere near me anymore.

 **Gay Egg 1:** @Gay Egg 2 explain yourself

 **Gay Egg 2:** what did i miss???

 **Gay Egg 1:** you?? and???? fukawa????? are???? DATING??????

 **Scissoring:** sorry 'maru

 **Gay Egg 2:** haha im in danger

 **Gay Egg 1:** HJSKJSHDJKH WHA HOW WHEN WHY?????

 **D31ZP41R:** da tea iz wonderful today

_ **Private Message with Ultra Despair Bisexual  
** _

**Ultra Despair Lesbian:** toko!!

 **Ultra Despair Bisexual:** yeah?

 **Ultra Despair Lesbian:** can i tell makoto about,, ykno us?

 **Ultra Despair Bisexual:** yeah of course, you dont have to ask

 **Ultra Despair Lesbian:** i kno! i just wanted to make sure!

 **Ultra Despair Bisexual:**... 

**Ultra Despair Lesbian:**?

 **Ultra Despair Bisexual:** I love you

 **Ultra Despair Lesbian:**!!! I love you too toki!

 **Ultra Despair Bisexual:** ugh never mind I take it back

 **Ultra Despair Lesbian:** wait no babeeeee

_**Ultra Despair Bisexual has gone offline!** _

**Ultra Despair Lesbian:** betrayal >:(

_ **Private Message with The Shorter Naegi** _

**The Taller Naegi:** makoto omg im so sorry i didnt tell you about me and toko

 **The Shorter Naegi:** I'm in shock, I feel so betrayed

 **The Taller Naegi:** stop being dramatic doofus!!

 **The Shorter Naegi:** ugh fine fine

 **The Shorter Naegi:** so when did,, this all happen?

 **The Taller Naegi:** oh um, toko and i met in this bookclub in the local library! we didnt really hit it off at the start, im pretty sure she hated me at first but um sdkhdh we got closer tho after a few weeks and i started to develop feelings for her! i didnt know what i was feeling at first cause ive never felt like that for another girl but after a few days of thinking i came to the realisation that im a lesbian!

 **The Shorter Naegi:** oh whoa okay

 **The Taller Naegi:** and after knowing eachother for a few months i finally got the courage to ask her out and !!! she said yes! gosh i was so happy i thought i was gunna start crying hehe 

**The Shorter Naegi:** how long have you guys been dating?

 **The Taller Naegi:** ummmm almost 7 months i think

 **The Shorter Naegi:** i- whoa.

 **The Shorter Naegi:** you kept your relationship hidden for that long?? 

**The Taller Naegi:** I thought you knew tbh, toko is always visiting our house and staying in my room

 **The Shorter Naegi:** oh gosh okay sdkjhdsk you better stay safe sis, use protection and all that

 **The Taller Naegi:** MAKOTO?????

_**The Shorter Naegi has gone offline!** _

**The Taller Naegi:** asshole

_**The Taller Naegi has gone offline!** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i got into danganronpa like 5 months ago and i cant get out please help me anyhoo hope yall liked that cause damn typing da usernames was annoying hjfjfhgf


	2. dang chiaki you have 2 girlfriends??

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> da jabberwock gang has a gc, its chaotic and everyone is gay  
> chiaki/sonia/mikan are already in a relationship cause frankly im too lazy to write a whole romantic scene for them

_**Chiaki Nanami added 15 people to Luigi Got Big Tiddies** _

_ **Chiaki Nanami changed their name to Gaymer Grill** _

_ **Gaymer grill changed 15 names** _

_ **May 14 2XXX, 4:19pm** _

**Spikey boi:** what the fuck is that gc name

 **Gaymer Grill:** art thats what

 **Spikey boi:** also what the fuck is my name

 **Gaymer Grill:** I'll change it hold on

_**Gaymer Grill has changed Spikey boi's name to Dildo Head** _

**Dildo head:** i hate you you know that right 

**Gaymer Grill:** <3 i wuv u 2 hajimeme

 **Dildo head:** I hope you die and lose all ur stuff in minecraft >:(

**_ Mishima wannabe is online! _ **

**Mishima wannabe:** Oh, how wonderful to be in group chat full of incredible ultimates!

 **Mishima wannabe:** If I may ask Chiaki... who is Mishima?

 **Gaymer Grill:** This dude from a video game that kinda looks like you

 **Gaymer Grill:** _ mishima.jpg _

**Mishima wannabe:** oh.

_ **Rosalina is online!** _

**Gaymer Grill:**!!! HI PRINCESS

 **Rosalina:** HI SWEETIE!!!

_ **Valentine is online!** _

**Gaymer Grill:** BABY!!!!

 **Rosalina:** LOML!!!!

 **Valentine:** oh! um hi honeys hehe

_ **Minion bitch is online!** _

**Minion bitch:** ew gay ppl

_ **jUsT kIdDiNg is online!** _

**jUsT kIdDiNg:** hiyoko hun... _we're_ gay ppl

 **Minion bitch:** fuck

_ **Dad? and 4 others are online!** _

**Dad?:** HELLO EVERYONE 

**xXEmoKid69Xx:** Ah, greetings mortals... This name is quite,, hm

 **Can I fuck a car?:** OKAY I ASKED THAT ONE TIME CHIAKI

 **Gaymer Grill:** and i'll never let you forget it

 **cotten eye joe:** i fuckingsgdsdg hate you sj miych chiaki

 **Gaymer Grill:** aw you're the best too boss baby!

**cotten eye joe:**

**cotten eye joe:** im leaving

_**The cooler Byakuya and 4 others are online!** _

**The cooler Byakuya:** i like the name, thanks chi

 **Pretty rave girl:** YO YO YO IBUKI IZ IN DA HOUSEEEE

 **hot sword lesbian:** oh my-

**tig biddies:**

**tig biddies:** nice

 **chef boyardee:** well, my my what a wonderful group we have here ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **Gaymer Grill:** I am going to kick u

 **chef boyardee:** well, i wouldnt mind ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **Gaymer Grill:** why are u like this

 **chef boyardee:** why not ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **Gaymer Grill:** um chile anyways so

 **Gaymer Grill:** @Rosalina @Valentine you two free?

 **Valentine:** mhm!

 **Rosalina:** Yes!

 **Gaymer Grill** : wanna do a disney movie marathon?

 **Rosalina:** fuck yeah!

 **Valentine:** sonia don't swear! also I'd love to do that

**chef boyardee:**

**Rosalina:** oh don't you dare

 **chef boyardee:** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) yall must have so much 'fun' whilst you're alone together hm?

 **Gaymer Grill:** yall

 **Valentine:** yall

 **tig biddies:** yall

 **Dad?:** yall

 **Pretty rave girl:** yall

 **hot sword lesbian:** yall

 **Can I fuck a car?:** yall

 **xXEmoKid69Xx:** yall

 **cotten eye joe:** yall

 **Minion bitch:** yall

 **The cooler Byakuya:** yall

 **Dildo head:** yall

 **Mishima wannabe:** pardon me for insulting such a fine ultimate like you but, yall

 **jUsT kIdDiNg:** yall

 **Rosalina:** he isn't entirely wrong

 **Gaymer Grill:** BABE

 **Valentine:** SONIA 

_**Valentine and 2 others have gone offline!** _

**chef boyardee:** f in the chat for sonia

_ **12 people have gone offline!** _

**chef boyardee:** wow

_**chef boyardee has gone offline!** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lets go lesbians lets go
> 
> the chapter is a bit short, sorry about that but the next focuses on all the dr girls so uh get ready sdjkkdsj


	3. the spirit of sappho absolutely does not live within us

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> junko decided to add all the wlw in one groupchat

_ **D3ZP41R!!! added 23 people to Lesbos Island** _

_ **May 15 2XXX, 9:18pm** _

_**Tsumugi Shirogane and 2 others are online!** _

**D3ZP41R!!!:** hey ladiesssss

 **Tsumugi Shirogane:** ykno the author is going to plain suffer just having to type all of our names

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** yeah and? fuck that hoe

**Offbrand Miku:**

**Offbrand Miku:** mukurooooo junko and mugi are being weird againnn

 **Murkrow:** And that is my problem how?

 **Offbrand Miku:** >:( meanie

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** stop flirting

**Murkrow:**

**Offbrand Miku:**

**Offbrand Miku:** shut your up

_**Kirigiri Jing Jing is online!** _

**Kirigiri Jing Jing:** Why did you make another groupchat, Junko?

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** itz for da girlz nd da gayz 

**Kirigiri Jing Jing:** That explains nothing.

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** ugh arent u a detective??? mukuro explain it to her

 **Murkrow:** Why me of all people?

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** just do it dumbazz

 **Murkrow:** Fine.

 **Murkrow:** It's a groupchat of every girl from Class 78, Class 77-B and Class 79. Every girl in those classes all happen to be lesbian/bi/pan. 

**Kirigiri Jing Jing:** Really?

 **Murkrow:** Yes.

_ **Yumeko Kinnie is online!** _

**Yumeko Kinnie:** Can you not read right, Kyoko dear? Mukuro clearly stated _every girl,_ did she not?

 **Kirigiri Jing Jing:** Of course I can read right, Celestia. I'm just surprised that's all..

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** can yall do ur weird foreplay somewhere else itz rly ruining my vibe

 **Yumeko Kinnie:** Don't be crass, Junko.

 **Kirigiri Jing Jing:** Ahem, I have, ah. Other places to be.

_**Kirigiri Jing Jing is offline!** _

**Yumeko Kinnie:** Hm, how odd.

_**Yumeko Kinnie is offline!** _

**D3ZP41R!!!:** oh sip sip da tea is delicious 

_**Gaymer grill and 2 others are online!** _

**Gaymer Grill:** oh nice gc junko

 **Rosalina:** The name really ties it all together!

 **Valentine** : oh gosh, there's so many people in here

 **Tsumugi Shirogane:** I don't know you gals, but I'm loving the names

 **Gaymer Grill:** hehe ty i chose them myself. I'm Chiaki btw

 **Rosalina:** I'm Sonia!

 **Valentine:** oh you do know me Shirogane-san! It's Mikan, the school nurse

 **Tsumugi Shirogane:** MIKI???

 **Gaymer Grill:** Miki??

 **Rosalina:** Miki????

 **D3ZP41R:** _:eyes: :eyes: :eyes:_

 **Tsumugi Shirogane:** That's just plain embarrasing! I can't believe I couldn't recognize my favourite nurse!

 **Valentine:** _I mean... I am the only nurse in the school for some reason_

 **Gaymer Grill:** hmmmm

 **Rosalina:** hmmmmmm

 **Gaymer Grill:** _ suspicious... _

**Rosalina:** _Indeed it is... indeed it is...._

**Valentine:** um, don't think into that too much you two! Shirogane-san and I became friends because she comes to the office so much

 **Tsumugi Shirogane:** That's true! I'm such a plain klutz, I get hurt making my cosplays all the time!

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** sonny, chi itz despairingly adorbs dat u 2 r so protective over ur nurse gf but yall r boring me :/

 **Tsumugi Shirogane:** Dang Mikan, you got 2 gfs??

 **Valentine:** yep! and they're the sweetest :)

 **Offbrand Miku:** daanggg mikan, i dont even have _a_ gf

_**Murkrow deleted 1 message** _

**Offbrand Miku:**???

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** u useless lesbian u

 **Murkrow:** Hush.

**_ Murkrow is offline! _ **

**D3ZP41R!!!:** lol k

 **Offbrand** **Miku** **:** is she okay?? :((

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** yea im sure a pig like her is fine

 **Offbrand Miku:** jeezzz u should be nicer to ur sister u kno

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** me?? being nice to dat good for nothing bitch? yea rite in her dreamz

Mukuro placed ~~their~~ her phone down on ~~their~~ her bed, sighing ~~they~~ she hid ~~their~~ her face in ~~their~~ her hands. "Dumb dumb dumb dumb. Fuck! why are you so dumb, Mukuro?" ~~they~~ she groaned. _That was so dumb! Sayaka almost saw my message, god why am I like this?_ Mukuro breathed in and grabbed ~~their~~ her phone, reading the recent messages... _Ah..._ ** _She.._** _ **Her..**_ **_Sister.._** _Why do I feel so disgusted over those words? That can't be normal. I, I don't understand this._ ~~They~~ she set her phone down once again. I _should text Junko- wait no, she probably wouldn't want to be bothered.. especially about my issues. But she's my sister, I'm sure she'll understand._ Before Mukuro could send a message to Junko, ~~they~~ she heard 3 pinging noises from the phone. ~~They~~ She stared at the phone, hugging ~~their~~ her knees, wanting to do nothing with the groupchat Junko had made.

_**May 15 2XXX, 9:48pm** _

**D3ZP41R!!!:** @everyone

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** @everyone

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** @everyone

**_ 10+ people are online! _ **

**Miu Iruma:** oh FUCK OFF 

**Maki Harukawa:** do you want to die?

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** sure

 **Scissoring:** give us a fucking break junko

 **Miu Iruma:** ayee nice name

 **Minion Bitch:** junko why

 **jUsT kIdDiNg:** ^^^

 **Kaede Akamatsu:**...what is this?

 **Tenko Chabashira:** a chat with no degenerates around? heck yeah

 **Kirumi Toujo:** ah, how interesting

 **Strong lesbian:** This is... odd

 **Donuts & Pussy: **junko, why did you add me here

 **Pretty rave girl:** wowowow ibuki in a chat?? with so many beautiful ladiez??? did ibuki die nd go to heaven?

 **hot sword lesbian:** Ibuki, stop flirting with people you don't know

 **Pretty rave girl:** wahhhhh ibuki cant help it!! sorry sword lady

 **tig biddies:** sword lady? lmao 

**Gay Egg 2:** oh great, more people i dont know

 **Offbrand Miku:** oof i felt the sarcasm from here

 **Himiko Yumeno:** nyeh,,, i dont have enough mana for this

 **Angie Yonaga:** God has truly blessed us with a chat as wonderful as this!

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** hey!! i made dis chat ur god aint taking all da credit 

**Precious bby:** wait why am i here?? im not even a girl 

**Tenko Chabashira:** eek! a degenerate male!

 **Precious bby:** im not a guy either!!

 **Tenko Chabashira:** oh... well i guess thats fine

 **Precious bby:**... thank you?

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** chihiro, my sweet summer child diz gc iz 4 da girlz nd da gayz so ofc ur here

 **Precious bby:** oh huh okie! 

**D3ZP41R!!!:** so who else isnt online rn??

 **Tsumugi Shirogane:** hmm

 **Tsumugi Shirogane:** Kyoko, Celeste and Mukuro aren't online!

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** @Kirigiri Jing Jing@Yumeko Kinnie

_ **Yumeko Kinnie is online!** _

**Yumeko Kinnie:** What is it.

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** u wound me celes

 **Yumeko Kinnie:** Good.

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** rude anyway wheres ur detective gf

 **Yumeko Kinnie:** She isn't my girlfriend. And she's with me.

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** ooo spicey ;) wat r yall doin hmm??

 **Yumeko Kinnie:** If you must know, we are playing poker.

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** strip poker ;))))???

 **Yumeko Kinnie:** You disgust me.

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** u didnt say no doe :0

 **Yumeko Kinnie:** Agh, our business has nothing to do with you.

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** SUSPICIOUS!!

 **Yumeko Kinnie:** Goodbye, Junko.

**_ Yumeko Kinnie is offline! _ **

**D3ZP41R!!!:** dat waz like,,, rly suspicious rite?

 **Offbrand Miku:** oh absolutely

 **Offbrand Miku:** also junko, why didn't u @ muku?

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** i dont have to explain myself to u smurfette lookin ass

 **Offbrand Miku:** it was just a question???

_ **Private Message with The lamer twin** _

**The hotter twin:** mukuro? where da fuk r u??

 **The hotter twin:** i swear if u dont reply in 5 mins im gunna kill u

 **The hotter twin:** srsly muku. im getting worried

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tingz r getting spicey ladz


	4. these bitches gay! good for them! good for them!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i apologise for taking so long to update! i got my back injured and i could barely do anything cause of the amount of pain killers i was on jskdhjksdh

** Miu _ Iruma added 15 people to Barbz _ **

_ **Miu Iruma changed their name to Gorgeous Girl Genius** _

_ **Gorgeous Girl Genius changed 15 names** _

**Gorgeous Girl Genius:** ayy wassup fuckers

 **G-spot:** miu whyyyy

_ **Come on fuck me and Emo boy are online!** _

**Come on fuck me:** what???

 **Emo boy:** oh-

 **Gorgeous Girl Genius:** kaito ur litch rally so uncultured

 **Gorgeous Girl Genius:** can yall believe space whore doesnt know queen ayesha erotica?? even pooichi knows her nd he listens to emo shit

 **Come on fuck me:** space whore????

 **Emo boy:** pooichi??

_ **Stab me daddy and 2 others are online!** _

**Stab me daddy:** im going to kill you miu

 **Maid mommy:** Miu, please stop making those noises.

 **Gorgeous Girl Genius:** sorry mommy

 **ya like jazz?:** hello evryon it me! gonta!! gonta vry hapy i am here talking to yiu all!

 **G-spot:** omg we dont deserve him

_**Panta fucker is online!** _

**Panta fucker:** nishishi what do we have here~?

 **Emo boy:** did you really have to type out your laugh?

 **Panta fucker:** well of course, my lovely shumai! it's part of my flair :3

 **Gorgeous Girl Genius:** _ shrekcringecomp.jpg _

**Panta fucker:** shut up slut!

 **Gorgeous Girl Genius:** s-slut??? 

**Come on fuck me:** thats kinda gay kokichi

 **G-spot:** rumour comes out: does kaito homophobe?

 **Come on fuck me:** hey! im not a homophobe!

 **Panta fucker:** that's what a homophobe would say

 **Come on fuck me:** im not???

_ **plain smoothie is online!** _

**plain smoothie** : identity role call time!!! i'll start! @everyone

 **plain smoothie:** pan she/they

 **Gorgeous Girl Genius:** lesbiab cis gorl

 **Panta fucker:** gay nd trans he/him

 **Maid mommy:** ace enby lesbian she/they

 **Stab me daddy:** bi and trans she/her

 **Folklore cunt:** Pan enby they/them

 **Cyborg:** questioning he/they

 **Emo boy:** gay cis dude

 **My dad knows god:** Angie loves everyone! any pronouns! :)

 **Miss Andry:** trans lesbian and very proud! she/her

 **mage loli:** ace bi she/they

 **G-spot:** lesbian and cis gal

 **bOnK:** pan enby he/they

 **nyah~:** bi cis guy

 **ya like jazz:** gonta no understand but he love evryon!!! :D

 **Come on fuck me:** straight cis man

 **Panta fucker:** ewwww!! bully the hettie

 **G-spot:** boooo

 **Miss Andry:** boooooo

 **Maid mommy:** stop bullying kaito

 **Come on fuck me:** yeah!! listen to kirumi

 **ya like jazz:** gonta wants 2 join in 2!! :D boooooo!

 **Come on fuck me:** ouch gonta

 **Come on fuck me:** its not my fault im straight tho lmao 

**Come on fuck me:** being gay just isnt my thing

 **Panta fucker:** u make it sound like being gay is a choice

 **Miss Andry:** hmm i sense internalised homophobia

 **Gorgeous Girl Genius:** r u like suddenly an expert in all things gay tenko

 **Miss Andry:** always have been and always will be 

**Panta fucker:** wow the power of lesbians

 **G-spot:** wlw/mlm solidarity 

**Gorgeous Girl Genius:** lol ur ass def aint str8 kaithoe have u seen the way u act around shuichi???

 **Come on fuck me:** he's my bro!! my awesome sidekick!!! i dont get it??

 **Emo boy:** what??

 **Folklore cunt:** hm, is this why you named Kaito and Shuichi those, ah... such... lovely names, Miu?

 **Gorgeous Girl Genius:** duh!! those 2 twinks have so much sexual tension that u can practically fucking smell the horny in the air! 

**Cyborg** : what is a twink?

 **Gorgeous Girl Genius:** you, you is a twink

 **Cyborg:** I am confused.

 **Come on fuck me:** yo can u not, me nd shu are just homies nothin else to it

 **Panta fucker:** hey space man i sent u a dm read it dumbass

 **plain smoothie** : oo! mind sharing it with the rest of the class? :)

 **Come on fuck me:** it just

 **Come on fuck me:** it just says "u gay lol" 

**G-spot:** ASJKHVCNBVNSDGHJDGS

 **Gorgeous Girl Genius:** LMFAO

 **plain smoothie** : PFFT

 **Miss Andry:** HAHAHSHDKJHDSJKH

 **Cyborg** : I'm confused, why is it so funny?

 **bOnK:** just smile and wave kii, just smile and wave

 **Emo** **boy** : im sorry for laughing but kiibo is literally smiling and waving at nothing

 **bOnK:** wait thats so adorable kii i didnt actually mean to do it literally

 **Folklore cunt:** hm

 **Panta fucker:** what r u hm hm-in about? minecraft villager lookin ass

 **Folklore cunt:** oh nothing, humanity is just so beautiful sometimes

 **mage loli:** nyeh so weird...

 **Miss Andry:** hella weird...

 **Gorgeous Girl Genius:** chloe price kinnie

 **Miss Andry:** chloe price is hot as fuck so im taking that as a compliment

 **plain smoothie** : valid!! 

**G-spot:** oh god she really is hot

 **Panta fucker:** mommmmmm the lesbians are lesbianing againnnnnnnnn

 **Maid mommy:** good for them

 **Panta fucker:** JKHJKHDSJHKSD????

 **Panta fucker:** my own mother,,,, betraying me; Kokichi Ouma, the greatest man alive

 **Maid mommy:** I'm disowning you.

 **Panta fucker:** WAHHH DDDD:

**_ Private Message with Kaito Momota _ **

**Tenko Chabashira:** oi kaito

 **Kaito Momota:** tenko? why are you messaging me??

 **Kaito Momota:** and you said my name instead of degenerate? wow am i dreaming

 **Tenko Chabashira:** shut up!! i messaged you for a reason!

 **Tenko Chabashira:** We need to talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> when i first watched a drv3 playthrough and saw kaito, i instantly thought that he was the kinda guy to call me the d slur and some,, other colourful words JKSDHSDHK he isnt my most fav character but he's very lovable, i like that funky lil space guy but geeee i wonder why miss tenko is privately messaging him how suspicious


	5. junko stop bullying us

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi!! use this link!! like rn!!!!! https://blacklivesmatter.carrd.co/

_**Home Of Sexuals** _

_**11:50pm** _

**D3ZP41R!!!:** whtz poppin gaymerz B)))))

 **Rich Bitch Mcgee:** Goodbye.

_**Rich Bitch Mcgee has left the chat.** _

**D3ZP41R!!!:** u fucken whore

_**D3ZP41R!!! has added Byakuya Togami to Home of Sexuals!** _

_**D3ZP41R!!! has changed Byakuya Togami's name!** _

**Raymond:** I hate you.

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** mwAH i luv u 2 toegaymi 

**Raymond:** You will hear from my lawyers in a few hours.

_**Raymond has gone offline!** _

**D3ZP41R!!!:** jeez who put a stick up his ass

 **Ballz:** lmao prolly makoto if u kno wat i mean 

**D3ZP41R!!!:** hehe nice

 **Gay Egg 1:** wha???

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** oh nothingggg~ dont worry bout it eggy

 **Gay Egg 2:** ewwww dont say that about my brother and byakuyaaaaa

 **Gay Egg 1:**???

 **Gay Egg 1:** OH

 **Gay Egg 1:** H E Y

 **Gay Egg 1:** I'LL HECKIN SORE WA CHIGAU UR FACE

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** juz say fuck lik a normal person u loser

 **Gay Egg 1:** no!

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** u go gurl!🧚✨ no lik srsly leave!🦋🥰

 **Gay Egg 1:** D:

 **Gay Egg 2:** hey!!! only im allowed to bully makoto!!

 **Scissoring:** what the fuck 

**D3ZP41R!!!:** u put the flaw🧚🏼♀️✨ 💕in flawless💫🌺❤️

 **Scissoring:** why are you like this

 **Offbrand Miku:** wh-

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** Imagine being that talented🧚🏼♀️✨💋yea keep imagining😍🥰❤️

 **Offbrand Miku:** :((( meanieeeeee

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** lol wot r u goin to do? call ur soldier gf again???

 **Offbrand Miku:** ykno what maybe i will @Murkrow junkrat is being mean againnnn 

**Ballz: 👀** she didnt deny the gf part 👀👀👀

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** 👀👀👀👀 did my pig of a sister finally get some coochie??

 **Murkrow** : What is it, Saya?

 **Ballz:** saya?? 👀👀👀

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** DID MY SISTER LITERALLY GET A FUCKING GF BEFORE I DID????

 **Murkrow:** Sounds like a you problem.

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** heart 💔 been broke 📉 so many times ⏰ i don’t know 🤔 what to believe 💯 mama 👩❤️💋👩 said 🗣 it’s my fault 😢 it’s my fault 🤦🏻♂️i wear my heart ❤️ on my sleeve 💪 i think it’s best 👍🏻 I put my heart ❤️ on ice 🧊

 **D3ZP41R!!!:** shes,,,, actually,,,,, talking back to me,,,,,,,, where did my sweet obedient stinky sister go..........

 **Murkrow:**...

 **Murkrow:** I'll talk to you later.

_**Murkrow has gone offline!** _

**D3ZP41R!!!:** god i hate this vague fuckin bitch

_**D3ZP41R!!! has gone offline!** _

**Ballz:** oh shit

 **Gay Egg 1:** oh heck

 **Scissoring:** oh no

 **Offbrand Miku:** oh god

 **Gay Egg 2:** fuck

 **Gay Egg 1:** K O M A R U

_ **Private Message with The lamer twin** _

**The hotter twin:** mukuro!! what the fuck is up with you, you've been acting so fucking weird these past few days ever since i last checked up on you and you just ignored me. What. The. Fuck.

 **The lamer twin:** Wow, that is probably the most coherent sentence, I've ever seen you type out. 

**The hotter twin:** haha funny, now fucking explain yourself.

 **The lamer twin:** It's nothing, you don't need to worry about it.

 **The hotter twin:** mukuro... i know i act like a fucking bitch to you most of time but you're my sister, i care about you.

 **The lamer twin:**...

 **The lamer twin:** I don't know how to say this to you..

 **The hotter twin:** are you pregnant??? 

**The lamer twin:** No?? What?! I don't even like men???

 **The hotter twin:** i know thattt i thought this was like a,, virgin mary kinda situation

 **The lamer twin:**...Anyway,

 **The lamer twin:** There's been this... issue, that I've been having for a while and, I don't know how to even start to explaining it to you.

 **The hotter twin:** geeeezzzz back with this vague shit again, just spit it out!!! 

**The lamer twin:** I can't just say it! It's fucking hard, okay!

 **The hotter twin:** shit... this actually seems serious,,, im sorry muku

 **The lamer twin:** No, no. I shouldn't have yelled, I apologise.

 **The hotter twin:** i wont interrupt you, i'll let you do the talking

 **The lamer twin:** Thank you, I love you.

 **The lamer twin:** I...

 **The lamer twin** **:** I don't think I want to be your sister anymore.

 **The hotter twin:** bruh

 **The hotter twin:** are you disowning me tf???

 **The lamer twin** **:** Wait, I didn't word that right, my apologies.

 **The lamer twin** **:** I don't feel like a woman, Junko.

 **The hotter twin:** oh

 **The hotter twin:** do you uh,,,

 **The hotter twin:** do ya wanna be a dude then?

 **The lamer twin:** No, I don't feel like a man either... well, I feel like a man and a woman, but at the same time not. It's disturbing, I feel weird.

 **The lamer twin** **:** It's weird, right? It's not normal.

 **The hotter twin:** hey chill out, its okay. its definitely not weird really valid actually

 **The hotter twin:** i dont wanna put a label on this or anythin but it sounds like you could be non-binary? 

**The lamer twin** **:** Like Chihiro?

 **The hotter twin:** ye like them, u could like idk talk to them about it if u want

 **The lamer twin** **:** That...

 **The lamer twin** **:** That's very helpful, thank you, Junko.

 **The hotter twin:** hehe no problem for a hot piece of ass like me 

**The lamer twin** **:** Thank you for being so understanding... I love you

_**The lamer twin has gone offline!** _

**The hotter twin:** jeezzz what a sap

**The hotter twin:** ~~I love you too Muku~~

_**The hotter twin has deleted 1 message** _

_**The hotter twin has gone offline!** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was so fucking long, im so sorry lads


	6. This🍑one👆🏾is✨for💅 the🌞boys👨🏾🦱with⛽️the booming✳️system💵 Top👄down⬇️, AC🌚with the💨cooler🔥system

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chap was jus an excuse for me to be dumb nd gay
> 
> (also i made everyone's names to jus their first names because i,,, i jus,,, i jus did not have the motivation nd creativity to write down haha funnie nicknames. if u do not like it.. i am not sorry)

** _ninki minjaj_ **

** _8:33pm_ **

**Junko:** wooloowoo!! wat iz ur wizdom fo todae??

 **Miu:** world hard and cold, tiddy warm & soff

 **Tsumugi:** Watch Naruto!!

 **Mikan:** shkvjhdksh..s.dsdjhdskhsdh...gggirlllss...sjhksdjhdksjh

 **Kaede:** bake bread with the love of ur life!!! 

**Sayaka:** AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA <3 

**Mukuro** : Girl. Hot..

**Junko:**

**Junko:** whoa,,,,, that was so out of character muku

 **Mukuro** : You make it sound as if I am a fictional character.

 **Tsumugi:** You never know! nishi~

 **Miu:** kokichi kinnie type beat

 **Tsumugi:** you wound me

 **Miu:** serves u right

 **Mikan:** that actually was really out of character for mukuro,,,, is she alright

 **Junko:** eh who knowz my sibling may be gross nd ugly but they are rite 

**Mukuro** : ah

 **Mukuro** : give me a moment

** _Mukuro has gone offline!_ **

**Junko:** lol fukin loser

 **Mikan:**??? is she okay??

 **Sayaka:** they'll be fine hdskjsh 

**Junko:** en knee wheyz

 **Junko:** 𝔁𝓾𝓮🥶𝓱𝓾𝓪🧚♀️𝓹𝓲𝓪𝓸😻𝓹𝓲𝓪𝓸🗿𝓫𝓮𝓲👺𝓯𝓮𝓷𝓰🤩𝔁𝓲𝓪𝓸😼𝔁𝓲𝓪𝓸👣

 **Miu:** Baddie 💓🧚♀️✨ but the bad is silent ✨🌸😍

 **Junko:** u get me 

**Miu:** anything for u junko baby 😘😘 

**Junko:** god ur so 😻😻😻 sexy 😻😻

 **Sayaka:** KHDSKHSDKJHSD i hate yall 

**Junko:** mwAH i love u smurf whore ur so hot

 **Sayaka:** im flattered bottle blonde but i have a significant other 😔😔😭

 **Junko:** BOTTLE BLONDE?? YOU SLUT ACSLAJSLJASKLJLASJK

 **Miu:** wow this is so sad kiibo play times we had

 **Tsumugi:** remember 🤔the ✨times⌛️we🤞🏾had😪the😭 times ⏰ that🤥you 👧 and😴me👦 had😰

 **Junko:** fuck me like rn 

**Kaede:** GIRL CHILL OUT SDHKVKJSDHKJSDH

 **Junko:** dis iz how i shoot my shot stfu piano fucker 

**Kaede:** You are such a great role model!🦋🧚🏼♀️👑🌸for showing people that not everyone is good at everything🤩✨🐝🍃🌈😍

 **Miu:**...... im in love with you

 **Kaede:** bruh

 **Mikan:** um??

 **Tsumugi:** WHO KNEW KAEDE WAS A BRUH GIRL

 **Junko:** THATS BULLSHIT SHES LITERALLY THE MOST HIII GIRL IVE EVER MET

 **Tsumugi:** HOW THE FUCK DO YOU EXPLAIN THE BRUH SHE JUST SENT??  
  
**Junko:**

 **Junko:** fuck

 **Sayaka:** okay are we going to just ignore the fact ms iruma just confessed her love to kaede

 **Miu:** ms iruma?? tf who r u?? kazuichi?

 **Mikan:** don't change the subject!!

 **Miu:** i was um

 **Miu:** como se dice

 **Miu:** joking

 **Miu:** joshing around

 **Miu:** foolin yall ahaha

**Sayaka: 👀👀👀👀👀**

**Junko: 👀👀👀**

**Tsumugi:** is she,,, ykno... 👀👀

 **Mikan:** i think she might be,,,,,, 👀

 **Kaede:** uh, can we talk about this?

 **Kaede:** in private? please?

 **Miu:** oh ahahah,,, sure

 **Kaede:** my room. 10 mins.

_**Kaede has gone offline!** _

**Miu:** im either so dead or getting railed

 **Junko:** bottom 🤩🤩🤩

 **Sayaka:** bottom 🤩🤩🤩

 **Tsumugi:** bottom 🤩🤩🤩

 **Mikan:** bottom **🤩🤩🤩**

_**Mukuro is now online!** _

**Mukuro:** bottom **🤩🤩🤩**

 **Miu:** i hayteyy yououo alkl sio kiuojd miuchdjkjs

 **Junko:** go get that piano fucking coochie babe 😻😻

_**Miu has gone offline!** _

**Sayaka:** are they gunna fuck

 **Tsumugi:** yeah ❤️

 **Mikan:** yeah ❤️

 **Junko:** yeah ❤️

 **Mukuro:** yeah ❤️ 

**Junko:** u ARE literally so out of character today r u zooted

 **Mukuro:** No, just happy.

 **Junko:** ewww u nd sayaka frenched didnt u 

**Sayaka:** no???? even if we did its not any of your business?????

 **Junko:** grosssss yall totes didddddd ughhhhhh

 **Junko:** yall make me hate gay ppl 😾😾😾

 **Mikan:** didnt you like... ask Shirogane-san to uh.. f*ck you?

 **Sayaka:** aw mikan is so innocent

 **Junko:** yes and? itz not gay if socks are on

 **Junko:** also dont try to pretend that ur a goody two shoes nursey i kno what u do with ur gfs 👀👀 yall aint quiet whatsoever esp u miki

 **Sayaka:** UMMM HELLO??? SKJHKSDHKEWHIFHKSH

 **Mikan:** SSSHUHSHSHUSH?????SHUKJSDHKJDHFKSHUHSUHSUSUHSHSSHUHSSHSH

 **Mukuro:** Well, that was something I definitely did not need to know about Mikan.

 **Tsumugi:** WELL THEN WHATS THE WEATHER LIKE TODAY LADIES 

**Sayaka:** ABSOLUTELY FANTASTIC HOW'S THE CHICKEN

 **Mukuro:** A bit bland.

 **Sayaka:** you are truly the one for me...

 **Tsumugi:** stop being cute and gay, it keeps reminding me that im single

 **Junko:** offer still stands miss plain jane 👀

 **Tsumugi:** Oh my god 

**Sayaka:** can yall be gay somewhere else

 **Junko:** Okay I see you 😍😍✨👀 but i wish I didn’t❤️🧚🏻🌸💫

 **Sayaka:** ooo you mayyy sayyyyy im aaa dreammmeeerrrrrr

 **Mukuro:** I 😋 was 🤔 a girl ♀️ in the village 🏕 doing 👩🏻 alright 💁🏻♀️then I became 🌹 a princess 👸🏻over 🙅🏻♀️ night 🌠 now I gotta figure 🐸 out 🏖 how to do it 🙌🏻 right 👌🏻 so much 🙊 to learn 🏆 and see 👀, up 🌅 in the castle 🏰 with my new 🙌🏻 family 👨👩👧👧, in a school 🏫 that's JUST 👍🏻 for royalty 👑 in a new whole 🗺 world 🌏 is waiting 🕘 for ME 🙆🏻♀️ IM SO EXCITED 😋 TO BE 🤩 SOFIA THE FIRST 👘📿💄💍💎👑🌺, I'm finding 💃🏻 out what being royals 🙄👑 all about 🤩 (sofia the first 🌺) makin my way 🤟🏻 it's an adventure 🙆🏻♀️🦄🧟♀️🧜🏽♀️🧚♀️ EVERYDAY 😙🌅🏞🌆⛼ SOFIA 🧚♀️ its gon 😜 be 🤟🏻 my time 🕠 SOFIA 😌 to show 💁🏻♀️ them ALL 👊🏻👊🏼👊🏽👊🏾👊🏿 that I'm sofia 😂 (the first 🥇😙)

 **Sayaka:** G O O D B Y E JKHFSKJSHDFJKHDS 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was the most chaotic thing ive ever written
> 
> im not sorry for writing this cause i had so much fun it was great, what i am sorry for is doe is ending this chap rly weirdly it be like dat sometimez
> 
> a lot of relationships happen behind the scenes or thru messages. im really sorry about that, i will try to write actual scenes for stuff like that but im actual crap at it dskkjhdsjk i jus hope yall are enjoying this as much as i am
> 
> (also!! muku got a bit misgendered here today it suckz. sorry muku but only cause they arent out to a lot of ppl jus yet. jus junko nd sayaka!)


	7. wait,, yall are actually gay? i thought we were joking...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> no chat!!! just fluff between most of the ships in this fic

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi,,,, how yall doin....?
> 
> its been a while hi everyone

The soldier and the idol were outside on the school grounds by a tree, basking in the sunlight. Sayaka was laying on the grass, sitting up abruptly, she looked over to her partner. "Muku?"

They looked up from their book, "yes?"

Sayaka pouted, "you're so focused on your book! Give me attentionnnn." The bluenette stood up and took the book off her partners hands, dog earing it despite Mukuro's protests. She sat on their lap, nuzzling into their neck. Ikusaba tensed, not yet used to being touched and receiving affection. After a moment, they relaxed and pulled Sayaka closer.

"You're like a child, Maizono." They teased.

The girl pouted even more and squished the taller teens cheeks with her hands. Giggling, she placed a small kiss on their scrunched up nose. "You're so mean, Muku! And gosh, do you have to call me by my last name? It's so formal."

Mukuro smiled, leaning their forehead on Sayaka's shoulder, pulling her even closer. "I'm just teasing, my love."

The idol blushed, surprised at the sudden pet-name. "G-geez, that's really gay, Ikusaba."

They snorted and started to place light kisses on the blue haired girl's neck and face. Muttering cheesy pet-names between each kiss. "My love, my moonlight, my bluebird, my heart, my treasure, my darling one, honey-voiced, the girl of my dreams-" Sayaka blushed even more, trying to pull away from her partner's strong grip since her weakness is tickles.

"Mu- Muku! St-ha! Stoppp, y-you're ssuch a b-bullyyyy!"

The soldier took pity on their girlfriend and stopped, giving her one last kiss on the lips. "I'm so in love with you."

* * *

  
"Ay yo, Chi! Are we still playing fort- Oop." Souda stopped halfway through opening Chiaki's dorm room door. He saw that Chiaki was, well. Quite occupied. The small girl was in the middle of a sleeping cuddle pile. Mikan by her left, Sonia on the right, her arms around both of them. Chiaki's switch still making beeps and game noises. _Ayy, she's playing Animal Crossing. Cultured._ Souda nodded to himself, grinning.

"My prince?"

Startled, he turned to meet the multi coloured eyes of his very, very, very handsome boyfriend. "Oh! Hey Gundham!"

The taller boy glanced over to the slightly open door, "did you have business with Nanami?"

Souda scratched the back of his head, smiling sheepishly, "yeah, yeah. Ha, um- I was gonna ask her to play a game with me, but she's kinda busy." 

Gundham stepped closer, seeing the situation. "Oh, I see. How endearing." He gently closed the door and turned back to face his boyfriend. "Best not to interrupt the princess and her loves. The darker boy took hold of his brighter counterpart's hand. "Might I say? You look quite wonderful, my light."

The pink haired boy seemed taken aback, "Jesus Christ, Gundham. Warn a guy before you say that kinda stuff." 

"I apologise, I didn't mean to offend you, dear." Tanaka slightly lessened his hold on Kazuichi's hand, scared that he may have hurt him.

"No, wait- Shit. You didn't offend me, just. Just took me by surprise, is all." The shorter boy intertwined their fingers together, not wanting to let go just yet.

"I see, well. I'll try not to surprise you as much next time, yes?" Souda nodded. "You truly are the light to my darkness."

Kazuchi grinned, knowing that the odd catchphrase Gundham says and says only to him, is his odd way of saying I love you. "Yeah, yeah. I love you too, doofus."

* * *

Toko glared at her girlfriend, her lovely girlfriend, her very totally responsible girlfriend. "Komaru."

"Yesss?" Komaru smiled that dumb cute smile of hers, pretending she was innocent.

"Did you fucking adopt 5 kids without telling me?" She raised a brow, not impressed whatsoever.

Completely ignoring the question, Komaru gasped dramatically and tried to cover the kids ears, failing miserably of course. "Don't swear around the kids!"

"Fuck you??" 

"How dare you?!" 

The 5 kids watched the older girls argue, they gave each other looks saying: _Yeah, I don't know either._ Though one of the kids, a pink haired one looked ready to burst, she was bouncing on her heels, filled with childish glee.

"Hehehehe"

Komaru went silent and glanced over to child. "Hey, Kotoko sweetie? You okay?"

Kotoko grinned from ear to ear and inhaled deeply- "FUCK!" 

"TOKO"

"WHY ARE YOU BLAMING ME?"

"YOU'RE THE ONE WHO SWORE AROUND THE KIDS!"

A green haired girl went up to Komaru, tugged on her shirt and in the sweetest voice said, "hey, can you shut up?"

It was Toko's turn to gasp dramatically, "don't speak to your mother like that!"

The taller Naegi felt betrayed, "oh so now I'm their mother???"

The writer had given up at this point. "I don't know what the fuck you want from me." 

Komaru pouted and stuck her tongue out, "meanie!"

Toko rolled her eyes, "you are _so_ immature."

"Yet, you love me."

Fukawa grabbed Komaru's hand and kissed the back of it, "That sure is fucking debatable."

* * *

"Looks like I win again, detective." The gambler smiled, pulling the chips toward herself.

The detective didn't want to give Celestia the satisfaction of seeing her annoyed, she looked at her blankly. "How surprising." Her tone dripping with sarcasm.

Celestia hid her giggle behind a hand, "you are just no fun, dear." 

Kyoko stood up from her seat, ready to leave the gambler's dorm, not wanting to deal with the liar's antics. "I think we're done here." But before she could even walk away, a hand wrapped around her wrist.

"Come now, Kyo-ko." The way the gambler said her name sent shivers down her spine. "Let's not play hard to get, alright?" The liar stood up and grinned at Kirigiri as if she were cornered prey. "How about some tea? What's your poison? Ah, don't tell me. I'll guess." She walked away to make the tea, humming to herself.

The detective didn't know what to do. She was so hypnotised with everything about Celestia. Despite her outbursts and constant lying, she was kind to Kyoko, well as kind Celestia Ludenberg can get. She annoyed the detective to no end, but she can't seem to stay away. 

Kirigiri's thoughts were interrupted when Celes came back with a tray of cups and teapots. She set it down on the table and poured one for herself and for the lavender haired girl. Kyoko took the cup and eyed it, nothing suspicious of course, but knowing the gambler she probably might've put cyanide in her tea. "Are you trying to poison me, Taeko?" 

Celeste's nose flared at her real name, not wanting to show her anger at Kyoko, she simply smiled and faked a laugh. "Of course not, darling... How dumb do you think I am?" 

The corner of Kyoko's mouth twitched, "I don't think you want me answer that." 

The lolita clenched her jaw. "My. You've clearly gotten quite sassy, Kirigiri." She took a sip from her tea. "If you keep running that mouth of yours, you might get yourself hurt." 

The lavender haired girl leaned closer to the goth. "Are you threatening me, Tae-ko?" 

She snarled, "you insolent, useless, good for nothing detective! I ought to just kill you right n-"

Before she could even finish her threat, Kyoko pulled Celestia forward by her collar and kissed her. Celestia didn't reciprocate for a moment and Kyoko's heart sank, she tried to pull away, but the gambler pulled her back in, her hands running through Kirigiri's hair. Her kiss more aggressive. Kyoko took a step back to breathe, unable to meet Celeste's eyes. "I-"  
  
Celeste touched her lips, her chest rising up and down heavily, not quite believing what just happened.

* * *

_**Authors note:**_ uh hi yall jdkjsdh i hope you guys?? liked this??? i never write like this so its prolly ahaha cringe but if u like reading more of this kinda stuff then ykno the chats pls comment? i wanna know yalls thoughts. i'm definitely planning more shit like this for other ships, i was gunna do 3 or more after celesgiri but wow its really late where i am and im losing motivation so that plan went bad 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know my writing style is funky let me vibe
> 
> also i was like so many words into this fic and my computer decided to be an asshole and reload and
> 
> and
> 
> i lost everything :)))
> 
> BUT
> 
> i rewrote all of it just for yall
> 
> please appreciate me i was so close to deleting the rest of this fic out of pure sadness and rage
> 
> (if u wanna follow my tumblr its @localmisandrist)


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